Little Me in Big China

Four years ago, I went to Japan, and wrote a separate post about every single day.  

It makes me giggle to think I had that much time during the trip to blog every day, and that I thought people were that interested in my trip.

This time around, I am trying mostly to hit the highlights.

So here we go:

I spent 10 days in Beijing and three days in Taipei with 10 students, 1 spouse of a student, and two other faculty members.

We stayed near Beijing Normal University, which houses a small family therapy program. Their faculty and students hosted us during our stay, along with students and faculty from Nova Southeastern and the University of Maryland.

The first night, they took us to a hot pot restaurant, where a dinner of cooking things in boiling broth quickly devolved into our students trying to do things like this:

We then spent the next few days touring Beijing, and seeing many sights, including the Forbidden City, where someone snapped a picture of me with Rick and Roy (the other two faculty members from BYU).

 We saw the Peking Opera, which reminded me a lot of the first act of a kabuki play I saw in Japan: elaborate costumes, makeup, men dressed as women, atonal singing, overly dramatic acting.

I spent a lot of time hanging out with the students. I tried to keep some boundaries, but it was pretty hard, especially when we went to church on Sunday and I was asked to comment on the young single ex-patriate men in the branch.

We spent time in Taipei, where Lexie introduced us to mango shaved ice, which, up to this point in my life, has to rank in the top five of best things I have ever eaten. We bought one of the dishes below to split between three people, and then bought another, and, finally, another.

We found a karaoke place near our hotel. Below is a picture of Rick, who is singing a duet with me to "Superstar," by the Carpenters. I think my soul left my body for a second. Conspicuously absent from this outing was Roy, but he made up for it later.

We visited the Temple of Heaven one day, where there were all kinds of activities going on around the grounds, including a little girl getting a chess lesson,

A group of retired people singing loudly from music books, 

And what turned out to be (I kid you not) a group of middle aged people holding "ads" for their unmarried children in the hope of pairing them off. I haven't told this story to my mom yet because I haven't wanted to give her any ideas.

Like Japan, much of my motivation for going to China was for the food. Most of the food we ate was family style, at a round table with a Lazy Susan. We served our own portions with our own chopsticks, which, unsurprisingly, resulted in several of us contracting the same digestive bug.

Or, possibly, it could have been one of the many things I ate from street vendors. I had to ask my students who speak Mandarin which pastries were filled with honey, and which were filled with red beans.

And speaking of Beans, this one is for all of my fellow former students of Roy Bean himself, whom I estimate make up 50% of my total readership. You're welcome. Now try unseeing it. Just typing this post, my brain was having trouble dealing with the logic that would allow him to wear this and simultaneously deem karaoke unacceptable.

Eventually, we did have a conference with several American scholars, several Chinese scholars, and a few students and faculty from both countries, so it was kind of like a work trip. 

Here's a shot of the entire BYU group at the conference.

I have many other stories about this trip, and I may get around to writing some more of them down at some point. However, tomorrow is the first day of school, so it will probably be awhile before that happens. It was a great end to the summer, and I am grateful for every moment.

Humblebrag 2: Nora Ephron Movies

I am a huge fan of the Pioneer Woman. As well as Nora Ephron movies. What do these things have in common?

After Nora Ephron died, the Pioneer Woman posted a quiz about Nora Ephron movies on her website. I happened to remember that she was posting the quiz right around the time I got done with a client, so I entered the quiz, got 100%, and ended up winning a $300 Amazon gift card! Why is this a humble brag, rather than a regular brag? Well, I'm a little embarrassed that while I sometimes forget the names of my students, I have a deep and extensive knowledge of something as trivial as Nora Ephron. But I do. It's not the only unimportant subject of which I have an extensive knowledge.

So I thought it was appropriate to chronicle my favorite moments from Nora Ephron's movies, as they just helped me win a contest.

After I heard that Nora Ephron died, I went through my DVD shelves and discovered I own four of her most well-known movies. The older I get, the more resentful I become of chick flicks that put unrealistic ideas in the minds of teenage girls about relationships. However, I can't help but love Nora Ephron. Sometimes it's nice to escape to a world where things end happily, and everyone is able to think of witty things to say at the right time. Plus, she always wrote such great supporting characters: Dave Chappelle in You've Got Mail, Carrie Fisher and Bruno Kirby in When Harry Met Sally, Rosie O'Donnell and Rob Reiner in Sleepless in Seattle, and Stanley Tucci in Julie and Julia. Here are some of my favorite scenes and quotes from each of those movies:

When Harry Met Sally

• The scene where Billy Crystal and Bruno Kirby are at the football game, and Billy Crystal is telling the sad story of how his wife left him. Meanwhile, the wave is going around the stadium, and they keep standing up for it. I think of it every time I'm at a football game and someone starts the wave.
• Bruno Kirby in the Pictionary Scene.
• Every single vignette with the older couples.
• Bruno Kirby and Carrie Fisher on their double date making no effort to spare the feelings of the people they were supposed to be out with.
• The wagon wheel coffee table scene.
• The scene in Sharper Image with the karaoke machine and the battery-operated pith helmet.
• The callback scene where Billy Crystal has bought the karaoke machine and leaves a musical message on Meg Ryan's answering machine. 

"Baby fish mouth!"*

"Six years later you find yourself singing 'Surrey With a Fringe on Top,' in front of Ira!"

"I want you to know that I will never want that wagon wheel coffee table."*

"There are two kinds of women: high maintenance and low maintenance...You're the worst kind: you're high maintenance, but you think you're low maintenance."*

"Someone is staring at you in 'Personal Growth'."*

“I’d like the chef salad, please, with the oil and vinegar on the side, and the apple pie a la mode.

But I’d like the pie heated, and I don’t want the ice cream on top, I want it on the side, and I’d like strawberry instead of vanilla if you have it, if not then no ice cream, just whipped cream, but only if it’s real, if it’s out of the can, then nothing.”

(Not even the pie?)

“No, just the pie, but then not heated.”

Sleepless in Seattle

• Rita Wilson's speech about the plot of An Affair to Remember, as well as the men's reactions to it. She pretty much steals the movie right out from under her husband's nose with that one scene.
• The exchange between Tom Hanks and Rob Reiner about what the dating scene is like in 1993, which ends with Rob Reiner checking out Tom Hanks's butt to let him know if it is "cute."
• The dinner table scene with Meg Ryan's family ("I'm allergic to bees.").
• On New Year's Eve, when Bill Pullman sings, "Dim sum, dim sum," while dancing with Meg Ryan.*
• Every scene between Tom Hanks and Ross Malinger, who plays his son. 

"Did you know if you play this backwards, it says 'Paul is dead'?"

"There is no way we are going on a plane to meet some woman who could be a crazy sick lunatic. Didn't you see Fatal Attraction?" "You wouldn't let me!"

"This is really fun...And helpful."

"This man makes the best soup you have ever eaten, and he is the meanest man in New York. I'm really serious about this. It's not just about the soup." There is speculation that he is referring to the same man on whom the Soup Nazi is based.

"That's your problem: you don't want to be in love; you want to be in love in a movie."

You've Got Mail

• The whole opening montage of Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan in New York City.
• The scene where the little girl sings "Tomorrow," while a patient accompanist valiantly keeps up with her.
• Just about every scene with Greg Kinnear.
• The running joke about The Godfather.
• The scene where Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks meet for the first time, and he makes every effort to avoid letting her finding out who he is.
• Dabney Coleman's appropriate use of the term "ironic."

"I was eloquent...(Expletive)!"

"You need quiet while a hot dog is singing?"*

"This place is a tomb! I'm going to the nut shop where it's fun."

"Thank yer, ladies and gentlemen."

"Where are my Tic Tacs?!"*

"It's my own fault. Never marry a man who lies." (giggle)

"Happy Thanksgiving back."

Julie and Julia

This may be my favorite movie of the four, partly because it inspired the cupcake project that consumed a year of my life. It is one of the few movies that I actually liked better than the book it was based on, and I credit Nora Ephron completely with that. While I liked the idea of the Julie and Julia project, I was not crazy about the way Julie Powell wrote about it. But I've read some of Nora Ephron's books, and I think the way she thought and wrote about food is really what comes out in the movie. I am ashamed to admit that I cry every time I watch it, and I'm even more ashamed to admit that I can't quite articulate why I cry. This one is more of a sentimental one for me, so I haven't included any funny quotes. But I do love this line:


"You know what I love about cooking? I love that after a day when nothing is sure, and when I say nothing, I mean, NOTHING, that you can come home and absolutely know that if you add egg yolks to chocolate and sugar and milk, it will get thick. It's such a comfort." These are words I live by.

*indicate subjects of a quiz question.

**I have had this post in my queue for awhile, but, like the Riley Nelson post, I thought it was too stupid to publish until propelled by something from my life.**

Humblebragging

I interrupt the string of Broadway rants to bring you something from my actual life:

A few weeks ago, a reporter from BYU's paper came to interview me about having a successful relationship.  The irony was not lost on me, thank you very much. I sort of forgot about it until this morning, when the clinic director sent me the link:

http://universe.byu.edu/index.php/2012/07/05/key-ingredients-to-a-successful-relationship/

Also, in case you are wondering what a humblebrag is, I have included a link to Harris Wittles' explanation on Grantland. I have to warn you, though, that, while Grantland is extremely entertaining, you will probably find yourself wanting back whatever time you spend on it.

And you can all stop laughing now.

Broadway Rant: Rent

I just watched Rent (the movie) for the first time. I have never been a huge fan of the story itself, but the musical itself is intriguing, as it featured breakout performances by some of Broadway's biggest stars of today, and, I presume, it is where Taye Diggs and Idina Menzel met and fell in love. I admire the way they managed to retain so much of the original Broadway cast for the movie--something that is rarely even attempted. Also, I dare you to listen to "Seasons of Love" and not get the "Five hundred twenty-five thousand, six hundred minutes," refrain stuck in your head.

It's the story of a group of bohemians living in New York, many of whom are HIV positive. Their worries mostly revolve around money (because none of them have it), their relationships (because they are not capable of having decent ones), and dying (because of the HIV). It is loosely based on the opera La Boheme, replacing tuberculosis with AIDS.

Many traditional theatergoers were not big fans of Rent, probably for the sexuality, the drug use, and the way everyone has AIDS. The thing I found most troubling (other than Adam Pascal's hair) was the fact that no one seemed to have a job. Granted, they were bohemian artists, and that seemed to be kind of the point, but it seems like kind of a no-brainer that if you don't have steady work, your chances of continuing to live in your apartment are pretty slim, regardless of whether or not Taye Diggs is your slumlord. I mean, don't most artists, musicians, and actors end up taking jobs as waitresses and couriers take jobs to make ends meet? Speaking of the apartment, I have to say that, at least in the movie, the apartment was HUGE. Did it not occur to the bohemians that they could probably get a smaller place and pay less rent?

Another thing that turned off traditional Broadway fans to Rent was the rock-opera feel of the score. Honestly, as long as someone is bursting into song at some point, I'm generally okay with whatever the style of music is. I kind of like the rock-and-roll-ness of Rent, which this cast pulls off beautifully. Even Taye Diggs has some pretty good singing chops. Of course, you have to bear in mind that this was not a stage show, but rather, a movie, and, typically, today, singing in TV and movies is "embellished." However, if you are really curious, it's basically the same cast as the OBC, so you can judge for yourself.

Or, if you want to approximate the stage show, there is a stage recording from the last Broadway performance in 2008. However, it contains none of the OBC, and instead, features, as Roger, a man one critic has referred to as "Not Adam Pascal" for his tendency to be the second actor in a role originated by Adam Pascal. However, he could also be called "Not Patrick Wilson," as he has also been the second guy in roles originated by Patrick Wilson. For those of you who are curious, this actor's name is Will Chase, and he can be seen in the first season of Smash.

Rent has not found its way onto my list of favorite musicals. However, the "live like you're dying" mentality of Rent is something I can get behind. While I have no plans to quit my job so that I can spend a year in my apartment trying to write ONE song, I can appreciate how much of my life slips away from me because I am doing things I have to do, or just doing things that don't have any meaning.

And, yes, I did download "Seasons of Love." Sue me.

Broadway Rant: Company

I someday have planned a post on the music of Stephen Sondheim in general, but I decided to talk about Company first for two reasons:

1) It's on Netflix instant stream currently, which means, if the review piques your interest, you can watch it with little difficulty.

2) It's about a single man in his 30's whose friends are all married. For some reason, it strikes a chord in me.

Company is an older musical (1970's), but not one I grew up knowing. It's not really what I would call family-friendly; although, by today's standards, it is pretty tame. It's really more of a series of vignettes than it is an overarching narrative. The lead, Bobby, is a single man approaching his birthday, and he gets these glimpses into the lives of his married friends, which cause him to reflect on his own relationships.

In many ways, this is the anti-Rent. All of these people are well-to-do, not overburdened with worries about having a place to live or dying of a fatal disease. Their problems are along the lines of relationship satisfaction, and whether it's better to be married or single. In other words, the same things people who go to the theater worry about, and the same things many of my clients bring up in therapy.

The songs themselves are thought-provoking in the way that Sondheim's stuff usually is. Bobby is a familiar archetype-he says he wants to be in a committed relationship, but he's afraid of commitment at the same time. I don't know any people like that. I'm certainly not one of those people. The songs perfectly describe the weirdness of being single with lines like, "Marry me a little, love me just enough."

The video available on Netflix features the 2006 production, which is really unique because all of the principle cast plays instruments. Think about that for a second. I am not talking about people playing the tambourine (though there is one cast member who plays the triangle); I'm talking about a French horn, the oboe, violins, a cello, everything. The cast is actually singing while they play (okay, not the woodwinds or the brass, but the strings and Triangle Lady). And, if I'm not mistaken, some of them are actually playing several different instruments, like the cast is a bunch of junior high band teachers.

Apparently, the director, John Doyle, of the production is a big fan of actors playing the instruments. I think it really works for Company, but he also directed Sweeney Todd that way, and I have trouble seeing Patti Lupone playing the tuba as Mrs. Lovett. And while a lot of people think it loses something with the minimalist orchestration, I kind of like the way the instruments become part of the cast. For example, the instruments really pay off during one song that features a call-and-answer of the husbands and their wives, while Bobby plays a sad, pathetic kazoo, and no one answers back, reminding him, yet again, what he doesn't have because he's single.

Ouch, Company. Ouch.

Broadway Rant: What the...?

I turned on the TV this evening, and, to my surprise, there was another musical on PBS that I had never seen before. It was called Love Never Dies, a sequel to Andrew Lloyd Webber's wildly successful The Phantom of the Opera. I feel like I have to share the weirdness I experienced with the world. This blog post contains spoilers, so if you do not want to have the suspense ruined for you, skip this post. Or just don't ever see this show.

I don't know how many musicals have spun off sequels, but I'm willing to bet not many. Particularly, if the original musical was based on a book by an author who has been dead since 1927. I have to pause to point out that I am a huge fan of The Phantom of the Opera. It ranks right up there with Newsies on the list of the most important musicals of my childhood. However, even as a child, I'm pretty sure I never thought, man, they need to write some more stories about the Phantom. And yet, Andrew Lloyd Webber did. 

The musical has, as yet, not made it to Broadway. It premiered in London in 2010, and ran for less than two years. Critics and audiences alike had very mixed feelings about it (some Phantom fans have a protest website called Love Should Die). Apparently, the show is very popular in Australia, which is where this show was filmed.

The story itself is set 10 years after the events of the original story. The original story took place in Paris, where the Phantom terrorized the Paris Opera House until he was stalked by an angry mob. His true love, Christine, whom he stalked, obsessed over, and built several creepy doll replicas of, married another man, and ran away. Ten years later, Christine and her husband, Raoul, have a child (who is really the Phantom's child because, sure), and the Phantom has emigrated to New York, where he runs a freak show on Coney Island. At the end of the show, Christine dies, and her son runs away with the Phantom.

So, here, in bullet point form, are the problems I had with the story, once I had accepted its existence:

• A megalomaniac like the Phantom is forced out of the Paris Opera House and is going to be content with an act on Coney Island? Okay, show.

• Meg Giry, in this show, is written to make the Phantom appear like a sane person. And there is not one but two women in love with the Phantom? What?

• Did anyone who saw the original musical conveniently forget that the Phantom murdered a bunch of people, or did everyone just think, sure, that guy should raise a child? They both like music, right?

• A few months ago, when I was prepping for my Family Violence class, I stumbled on a website that painstakingly dissected Bella and Edward's relationship in the Twilight books and pointed out all of the similarities between that relationship and a violent relationship. Even though I thought it was stupid, the author raised some good points (secrecy, stalking, isolation, etc.). That said, how are people not up in arms about the relationship between Christine and the Phantom? There was kidnapping, stalking, verbal abuse, murdering people, obsession, isolation...

• The show is trying to convince us that a relationship between Christine and the Phantom could work. But project into the future; if this were a real life relationship, it would probably end in murder-suicide. Just saying. Is this something we as theater-going public want to fantasize about?

• I have heard people compare Phantom to Andrew Lloyd Webber's relationship to ex-wife Sarah Brightman, who played Christine in the original London and Broadway productions. Lloyd Webber was a composer, Brightman was a singer. The true intent of this second musical seems to be to convince those of us who were happy that Christine married Raoul at the end of the first musical that, despite the fact that the Phantom was a horrible person, and Raoul was dashing, handsome, and rich, her heart was always with the Phantom. 

• And, some other stuff we didn't know: Raoul is an alcoholic and a gambler, which is the same as being a madman. So there. He deserves to play second fiddle.

• I'm slightly irritated by the two women from the local PBS station trying to convince me that this is good, and that I want to call my friends and tell them to turn on their TVs. I did text Lisa to tell her I was watching this, but I'm pretty sure what my text said was not what PBS had in mind.

The music itself was...okay. It reminds me of Dave Barry's critique of Paul McCartney's post-Beatle songs, pointing out the sharp dropoff in quality, which was more pronounced because of everything awesome that came before it. The music wasn't bad, but it wasn't moving in any way. It was particularly jarring because there were several callbacks to songs from the original.

As for the sets and costumes, they were incredible, possibly even better than the original. So that was something I liked. Of course, everything was vaguely creepy like I imagine sideshows always are, so the costumes and sets kind of enhanced that.

Needless to say, (but I'm going to say it anyway) I will not be knocking myself out to see this one if it ever makes it to Broadway (don't do it, Andrew). Even if it has Audra McDonald as Christine, Kristin Chenoweth as Meg, Adam Pascal as the Phantom, and Patrick Wilson reprising his role as Raoul.

Who am I kidding? Of course, I would go see that. I'm not made of stone.

Broadway Rant: Chess

Remember when they made a movie about the game Battleship, but it turned out it was really about aliens? That was weird, right?

So you'd think that a musical about chess would be equally weird. But there were no aliens. Only communists.

Chess is another one of those shows that I know about because a taping of it aired on PBS, much like Les Miz, Love Never Dies (stay tuned for a rant on that one), Sunday in the Park with George, and Company (a subject for another post). It was actually done more like a concert, so the staging was mostly done with a projector.

The lyrics written by Tim Rice, who was the lyricist for composers like Alan Menken (Aladdin), Elton John (Aida, Lion King), and Andrew Lloyd Webber (Evita). The score was written by Benny Andersson and Björn Ulvaeus, of ABBA. Doesn't that sound like the beginning of a fabulous musical?

Chess is set during the Cold War, so it features your basic American vs. Russian plot that was such a big thing in that era. The American, played by Adam Pascal, is the cocky and imbalanced reigning world champion of chess (based loosely on Bobby Fischer). The Russian, played by Josh Groban (yes, that Josh Groban) is the humble challenger. It was billed as a love triangle, as the American's girlfriend, played by Idina Menzel (Elphaba! Rachel's mom on Glee!) ends up with the Russian before the end of the first act. It could also be considered a love trapezoid, as the Soviet is actually married to another woman.

But, at its heart, it is about the Cold War. I think. The truth is, the plot is a little convoluted, and I had to keep referring to the show's Wikipedia page to understand what was going on. Apparently, that is one of the reasons Chess was never more popular. The nice thing about this concert was that there was a giant screen behind the stage, and when there was a change of time or place, it showed up on that screen. Even at that, it was a little hard to follow.

But, let's be honest, it was really about hearing Idina, Adam, and Josh. Menzel and Pascal both have sort of rock-and-roll kinds of voices. You wouldn't think those would go well with the almost operatic, certainly easy-listening stylings of Josh Groban, but they were fun to hear. The different voices fit the music very well. There were times when it felt like a Gilbert and Sullivan operetta, and other times where it felt like Mamma Mia. The songs Josh Groban sings tend to have heavy Eastern European influences, while Adam Pascal's songs were mostly introduced with an electric guitar. I am a huge fan of Showtune Saturday Nights, a program on a local station where they play Broadway songs for five hours. I have often heard Josh Groban's voice singing what sounded like another country's national anthem, and never knew what it was from. Turns out it was a song called "Anthem" from this recording of Chess.

Also from Chess is the song, "One Night in Bangkok," which I always thought was a weird song. It really has nothing to do with the plot, but it was a pretty awesome number, with Thai dancers and Adam Pascal in a white suit. However, the showstoppers are songs like Groban's "Anthem," Menzel's "Nobody's Side," and "Heaven Help My Heart," and "Someone Else's Story," by Kerry Ellis, who I had never heard of before, but who also played Elphaba in Wicked.

One of the interesting things about the book is that it emphasizes how life, despite human emotion and complications, is really more like chess, that people make moves, and other people respond, and in the end, you try to act like it was all intentional. As the play goes along, it becomes clearer that the players are also pawns. I found it incredibly interesting how they portrayed good and evil. The American is unlikeable until he starts to talk about his childhood. The Russian is a "nice guy" until you realize he's been cheating on his wife for years. I don't know that I would push people over to see a production of Chess, but I am a huge fan of this concert version, and I've been listening to the songs in my car for weeks.

If you happen to see it on TV, don't skip over it.