It's Not You; It's Me

Stay with me. This is part end-of-the-year musing and part important announcement.

This has been quite a year for me.

• On the frivolous side, I took trips to Texas, Washington, D.C., New York, Georgia, China, Taiwan, North Carolina, Los Angeles, San Diego, and Logan, UT (more on that in a minute).
• I attended the following plays, ranging from Broadway to very local: Memphis, Newsies, Porgy and Bess, a Mandy Patinkin concert (not a play, but I'm counting it because Mandy Patinkin. He said, "Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father. Prepare to die!" at the end of the show), In the Heights, the 39 Steps, the Secret Garden, Arsenic and Old Lace, Seven Brides for Seven Brothers, Little Shop of Horrors, and Spitfire Grill. 
• I attended nine college football games, including every BYU home game, two Utah State games (we'll get there in a minute) and my first ever college bowl game. It's a good thing I like football because those games represent many hours of driving and sitting that I will never get back.
• I bought a camera, took an introductory photography class, and by my count, have taken over 2,000 pictures since May. There are only about three of them that I am actually proud of.

On the professional side, I've had some things published that I'm pretty proud of; I've started a research project that I am very excited about; and, oh yeah

I am leaving BYU.

I haven't talked too much about it on this blog, out of respect to my employer/alma mater, and as an act of self-preservation, but I've been consumed by looking for a job for the better part of this last year, ever since BYU decided not to hire me for the position they had open last year. Another position is currently open at BYU (because, again, they didn't hire me), for which I would have interviewed if I hadn't found another job.

However, week before Christmas, I was offered a job at Utah State University, which means I will be leaving BYU in August, which is something I wouldn't have thought I would be saying at the beginning of this year. However, I am very excited for my new job, which has accounted for the numerous trips to Logan to check out the mid-singles ward and the football team (and, no, for you football fans, I didn't know Gary Andersen would be leaving when I accepted the job, but I am still optimistic about the Aggies next season. And, of course, I am always foolishly optimistic about the Cougars. That will never change).

And while I will always be a BYU fan at heart, and I have had many important relationships at BYU that will continue (after all, I'll only be moving 2 hours away), leaving the institution feels a little like a breakup. It's the right thing for me at this point in my life, but I can't say it doesn't still hurt a little.

It's not working. I'm going in a different direction. I'd like to see other people. It's not you; it's me. We are never, ever, ever getting back together.

Most likely.

Happy 2013 everyone! I have a feeling it's going to be a good one.

Manic Pixie Dream Guys

So, why, when there are so many things going on in my life today: job stuff, finals, family things, etc., did I decide that a) I needed to write something here, and b) it needed to be this link?

Because, for years, I have believed that this was a problem. The Manic Pixie Dream Guy is exactly what I am looking for in a man, and he doesn't actually exist. Now I have someone else backing me up.

A little bit of everything

It's been a long time since I've blogged anything that wasn't a Friday Night Lights quote.

I don't have any really good reasons for that. I've been really busy with work and other things. Rather than complain about not having time to blog anymore, I thought I'd just dump some pictures to serve as a visual explanation of all that I've been up to since I got home from China.

Below is a shot of Mike Leach from BYU's season opener against Washington State (he's the lone man in black standing on the sideline). This picture was taken from the other side of the stadium with my telephoto zoom lens. Snapping pictures of Mike Leach at a football game is pretty much exactly what I envisioned when I bought the lens.

Also, I am fairly sure this is the closest I will get to seeing my two alma maters play one another for some time. 

Below is a shot of me at AAMFT in North Carolina with two of my students. We are posing in front of our research poster.

I got to spend the weekend hanging out with Stephanie. Below is a shot of us from the Wamplers' retirement party, where we resolved to finally get a picture of us together (notice we don't have any from New York).

Coincidentally, this weekend was the weekend of the BYU/Utah game, and the only thing I have to document that is this weird reflection of what looks like a blue Y in one of the buildings in downtown North Carolina. A large group of faculty, students, alumni, and incredibly supportive friends took over the top floor of a bar that night to watch what turned out to be a heartbreaker of a game. But the lesson I learned was that, of the vast number of Mormon male MFTs I know, the one with the most knowledge about college football is Paul Springer. I don't think I would have guessed that going into the night. 

The next weekend, a good friend from my mission (in New York) had a big birthday. I hadn't seen him or his wife in about 8 years, and I had no idea they were living in Utah, so I happily went. I ran into Andrea Sundberg Fesler, who was my companion in the MTC, and then again in my third area. It turns out she lives in Lehi and is about to have her third child.

Then, a week later, I made a trek up to Logan to watch Utah State play UNLV. It made for a long weekend of football, as I had watched BYU wallop Hawaii the night before. It turns out a lot of my time this semester has been consumed by attending college football games. No complaints from me, but it does make for some long days which almost never involve cleaning my apartment or doing laundry at the end. You can't see it in this picture, but Utah State has this weird tradition of tossing students up in the air every time their team scores a touchdown. It was awesome and frightening.

I have before expressed my feelings about BYU's homecoming parade, but this was the first year I had the opportunity to be a part of it. I am a faculty advisor for our department's undergraduate student association, and it is the most fun thing I get to do as part of my job. This was our truck/float, which was definitely not as cool as the one belonging to the Orem Institute of Religion (below).

You probably can't tell from the picture, but the people pictured on the float are Mother Teresa, President Hinckley, Joseph Smith, and Elizabeth Smart. Also, they were blasting music by David Archuleta.

I also saw Ryan that weekend, which he talks about more on his blog, as well as the outcome of the football game that followed.






 That same weekend, my friend Megan had a bonfire in her backyard, where we sat around and talked over the great mysteries of life, including, but definitely not limited to why none of us are married.

Finally, my mom's side of the family had a Halloween party, which was almost as odd as the first year my dad's side of the family had one. Below is a shot of Mack as sushi (nigiri).

There have been other things: plays (Spitfire Grill, Little Shop of Horrors, In the Heights, and Arsenic and Old Lace for those of you keeping track), visits from the Okas, parties, more football, (if you can believe it) and an embarrassing amount of work. It's hard to believe it's almost November. No wonder I'm so tired. I'm crawling back into my cave to grade some papers. See you in December!

Life Lessons from Friday Night Lights.

Mike Winchell: You ever feel cursed, Coach? Like, no matter what, inside your heart you feel that you're gonna lose. Like something's hanging over you, following you like a witch or a demon that just... I feel like that all the time. Even when things are going good. When we're winnin', it's there. And when we're losin', it's there. 

Coach Gary Gaines: It took me a long time to realize that, uh, there ain't much difference between winnin' and losin', except for how the outside world treats you. But inside you, it's about all the same. It really is. Fact of the matter is, I believe that, uh, our only curses are the ones that are self-imposed. You know what I'm sayin'? We, all of us, dig our own holes.

'Tis the season, once again, for football and job applications.

Clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose.

Little Me in Big China

Four years ago, I went to Japan, and wrote a separate post about every single day.  

It makes me giggle to think I had that much time during the trip to blog every day, and that I thought people were that interested in my trip.

This time around, I am trying mostly to hit the highlights.

So here we go:

I spent 10 days in Beijing and three days in Taipei with 10 students, 1 spouse of a student, and two other faculty members.

We stayed near Beijing Normal University, which houses a small family therapy program. Their faculty and students hosted us during our stay, along with students and faculty from Nova Southeastern and the University of Maryland.

The first night, they took us to a hot pot restaurant, where a dinner of cooking things in boiling broth quickly devolved into our students trying to do things like this:

We then spent the next few days touring Beijing, and seeing many sights, including the Forbidden City, where someone snapped a picture of me with Rick and Roy (the other two faculty members from BYU).

 We saw the Peking Opera, which reminded me a lot of the first act of a kabuki play I saw in Japan: elaborate costumes, makeup, men dressed as women, atonal singing, overly dramatic acting.

I spent a lot of time hanging out with the students. I tried to keep some boundaries, but it was pretty hard, especially when we went to church on Sunday and I was asked to comment on the young single ex-patriate men in the branch.

We spent time in Taipei, where Lexie introduced us to mango shaved ice, which, up to this point in my life, has to rank in the top five of best things I have ever eaten. We bought one of the dishes below to split between three people, and then bought another, and, finally, another.

We found a karaoke place near our hotel. Below is a picture of Rick, who is singing a duet with me to "Superstar," by the Carpenters. I think my soul left my body for a second. Conspicuously absent from this outing was Roy, but he made up for it later.

We visited the Temple of Heaven one day, where there were all kinds of activities going on around the grounds, including a little girl getting a chess lesson,

A group of retired people singing loudly from music books, 

And what turned out to be (I kid you not) a group of middle aged people holding "ads" for their unmarried children in the hope of pairing them off. I haven't told this story to my mom yet because I haven't wanted to give her any ideas.

Like Japan, much of my motivation for going to China was for the food. Most of the food we ate was family style, at a round table with a Lazy Susan. We served our own portions with our own chopsticks, which, unsurprisingly, resulted in several of us contracting the same digestive bug.

Or, possibly, it could have been one of the many things I ate from street vendors. I had to ask my students who speak Mandarin which pastries were filled with honey, and which were filled with red beans.

And speaking of Beans, this one is for all of my fellow former students of Roy Bean himself, whom I estimate make up 50% of my total readership. You're welcome. Now try unseeing it. Just typing this post, my brain was having trouble dealing with the logic that would allow him to wear this and simultaneously deem karaoke unacceptable.

Eventually, we did have a conference with several American scholars, several Chinese scholars, and a few students and faculty from both countries, so it was kind of like a work trip. 

Here's a shot of the entire BYU group at the conference.

I have many other stories about this trip, and I may get around to writing some more of them down at some point. However, tomorrow is the first day of school, so it will probably be awhile before that happens. It was a great end to the summer, and I am grateful for every moment.

Humblebrag 2: Nora Ephron Movies

I am a huge fan of the Pioneer Woman. As well as Nora Ephron movies. What do these things have in common?

After Nora Ephron died, the Pioneer Woman posted a quiz about Nora Ephron movies on her website. I happened to remember that she was posting the quiz right around the time I got done with a client, so I entered the quiz, got 100%, and ended up winning a $300 Amazon gift card! Why is this a humble brag, rather than a regular brag? Well, I'm a little embarrassed that while I sometimes forget the names of my students, I have a deep and extensive knowledge of something as trivial as Nora Ephron. But I do. It's not the only unimportant subject of which I have an extensive knowledge.

So I thought it was appropriate to chronicle my favorite moments from Nora Ephron's movies, as they just helped me win a contest.

After I heard that Nora Ephron died, I went through my DVD shelves and discovered I own four of her most well-known movies. The older I get, the more resentful I become of chick flicks that put unrealistic ideas in the minds of teenage girls about relationships. However, I can't help but love Nora Ephron. Sometimes it's nice to escape to a world where things end happily, and everyone is able to think of witty things to say at the right time. Plus, she always wrote such great supporting characters: Dave Chappelle in You've Got Mail, Carrie Fisher and Bruno Kirby in When Harry Met Sally, Rosie O'Donnell and Rob Reiner in Sleepless in Seattle, and Stanley Tucci in Julie and Julia. Here are some of my favorite scenes and quotes from each of those movies:

When Harry Met Sally

• The scene where Billy Crystal and Bruno Kirby are at the football game, and Billy Crystal is telling the sad story of how his wife left him. Meanwhile, the wave is going around the stadium, and they keep standing up for it. I think of it every time I'm at a football game and someone starts the wave.
• Bruno Kirby in the Pictionary Scene.
• Every single vignette with the older couples.
• Bruno Kirby and Carrie Fisher on their double date making no effort to spare the feelings of the people they were supposed to be out with.
• The wagon wheel coffee table scene.
• The scene in Sharper Image with the karaoke machine and the battery-operated pith helmet.
• The callback scene where Billy Crystal has bought the karaoke machine and leaves a musical message on Meg Ryan's answering machine. 

"Baby fish mouth!"*

"Six years later you find yourself singing 'Surrey With a Fringe on Top,' in front of Ira!"

"I want you to know that I will never want that wagon wheel coffee table."*

"There are two kinds of women: high maintenance and low maintenance...You're the worst kind: you're high maintenance, but you think you're low maintenance."*

"Someone is staring at you in 'Personal Growth'."*

“I’d like the chef salad, please, with the oil and vinegar on the side, and the apple pie a la mode.

But I’d like the pie heated, and I don’t want the ice cream on top, I want it on the side, and I’d like strawberry instead of vanilla if you have it, if not then no ice cream, just whipped cream, but only if it’s real, if it’s out of the can, then nothing.”

(Not even the pie?)

“No, just the pie, but then not heated.”

Sleepless in Seattle

• Rita Wilson's speech about the plot of An Affair to Remember, as well as the men's reactions to it. She pretty much steals the movie right out from under her husband's nose with that one scene.
• The exchange between Tom Hanks and Rob Reiner about what the dating scene is like in 1993, which ends with Rob Reiner checking out Tom Hanks's butt to let him know if it is "cute."
• The dinner table scene with Meg Ryan's family ("I'm allergic to bees.").
• On New Year's Eve, when Bill Pullman sings, "Dim sum, dim sum," while dancing with Meg Ryan.*
• Every scene between Tom Hanks and Ross Malinger, who plays his son. 

"Did you know if you play this backwards, it says 'Paul is dead'?"

"There is no way we are going on a plane to meet some woman who could be a crazy sick lunatic. Didn't you see Fatal Attraction?" "You wouldn't let me!"

"This is really fun...And helpful."

"This man makes the best soup you have ever eaten, and he is the meanest man in New York. I'm really serious about this. It's not just about the soup." There is speculation that he is referring to the same man on whom the Soup Nazi is based.

"That's your problem: you don't want to be in love; you want to be in love in a movie."

You've Got Mail

• The whole opening montage of Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan in New York City.
• The scene where the little girl sings "Tomorrow," while a patient accompanist valiantly keeps up with her.
• Just about every scene with Greg Kinnear.
• The running joke about The Godfather.
• The scene where Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks meet for the first time, and he makes every effort to avoid letting her finding out who he is.
• Dabney Coleman's appropriate use of the term "ironic."

"I was eloquent...(Expletive)!"

"You need quiet while a hot dog is singing?"*

"This place is a tomb! I'm going to the nut shop where it's fun."

"Thank yer, ladies and gentlemen."

"Where are my Tic Tacs?!"*

"It's my own fault. Never marry a man who lies." (giggle)

"Happy Thanksgiving back."

Julie and Julia

This may be my favorite movie of the four, partly because it inspired the cupcake project that consumed a year of my life. It is one of the few movies that I actually liked better than the book it was based on, and I credit Nora Ephron completely with that. While I liked the idea of the Julie and Julia project, I was not crazy about the way Julie Powell wrote about it. But I've read some of Nora Ephron's books, and I think the way she thought and wrote about food is really what comes out in the movie. I am ashamed to admit that I cry every time I watch it, and I'm even more ashamed to admit that I can't quite articulate why I cry. This one is more of a sentimental one for me, so I haven't included any funny quotes. But I do love this line:


"You know what I love about cooking? I love that after a day when nothing is sure, and when I say nothing, I mean, NOTHING, that you can come home and absolutely know that if you add egg yolks to chocolate and sugar and milk, it will get thick. It's such a comfort." These are words I live by.

*indicate subjects of a quiz question.

**I have had this post in my queue for awhile, but, like the Riley Nelson post, I thought it was too stupid to publish until propelled by something from my life.**

Humblebragging

I interrupt the string of Broadway rants to bring you something from my actual life:

A few weeks ago, a reporter from BYU's paper came to interview me about having a successful relationship.  The irony was not lost on me, thank you very much. I sort of forgot about it until this morning, when the clinic director sent me the link:

http://universe.byu.edu/index.php/2012/07/05/key-ingredients-to-a-successful-relationship/

Also, in case you are wondering what a humblebrag is, I have included a link to Harris Wittles' explanation on Grantland. I have to warn you, though, that, while Grantland is extremely entertaining, you will probably find yourself wanting back whatever time you spend on it.

And you can all stop laughing now.

Broadway Rant: Rent

I just watched Rent (the movie) for the first time. I have never been a huge fan of the story itself, but the musical itself is intriguing, as it featured breakout performances by some of Broadway's biggest stars of today, and, I presume, it is where Taye Diggs and Idina Menzel met and fell in love. I admire the way they managed to retain so much of the original Broadway cast for the movie--something that is rarely even attempted. Also, I dare you to listen to "Seasons of Love" and not get the "Five hundred twenty-five thousand, six hundred minutes," refrain stuck in your head.

It's the story of a group of bohemians living in New York, many of whom are HIV positive. Their worries mostly revolve around money (because none of them have it), their relationships (because they are not capable of having decent ones), and dying (because of the HIV). It is loosely based on the opera La Boheme, replacing tuberculosis with AIDS.

Many traditional theatergoers were not big fans of Rent, probably for the sexuality, the drug use, and the way everyone has AIDS. The thing I found most troubling (other than Adam Pascal's hair) was the fact that no one seemed to have a job. Granted, they were bohemian artists, and that seemed to be kind of the point, but it seems like kind of a no-brainer that if you don't have steady work, your chances of continuing to live in your apartment are pretty slim, regardless of whether or not Taye Diggs is your slumlord. I mean, don't most artists, musicians, and actors end up taking jobs as waitresses and couriers take jobs to make ends meet? Speaking of the apartment, I have to say that, at least in the movie, the apartment was HUGE. Did it not occur to the bohemians that they could probably get a smaller place and pay less rent?

Another thing that turned off traditional Broadway fans to Rent was the rock-opera feel of the score. Honestly, as long as someone is bursting into song at some point, I'm generally okay with whatever the style of music is. I kind of like the rock-and-roll-ness of Rent, which this cast pulls off beautifully. Even Taye Diggs has some pretty good singing chops. Of course, you have to bear in mind that this was not a stage show, but rather, a movie, and, typically, today, singing in TV and movies is "embellished." However, if you are really curious, it's basically the same cast as the OBC, so you can judge for yourself.

Or, if you want to approximate the stage show, there is a stage recording from the last Broadway performance in 2008. However, it contains none of the OBC, and instead, features, as Roger, a man one critic has referred to as "Not Adam Pascal" for his tendency to be the second actor in a role originated by Adam Pascal. However, he could also be called "Not Patrick Wilson," as he has also been the second guy in roles originated by Patrick Wilson. For those of you who are curious, this actor's name is Will Chase, and he can be seen in the first season of Smash.

Rent has not found its way onto my list of favorite musicals. However, the "live like you're dying" mentality of Rent is something I can get behind. While I have no plans to quit my job so that I can spend a year in my apartment trying to write ONE song, I can appreciate how much of my life slips away from me because I am doing things I have to do, or just doing things that don't have any meaning.

And, yes, I did download "Seasons of Love." Sue me.

Broadway Rant: Company

I someday have planned a post on the music of Stephen Sondheim in general, but I decided to talk about Company first for two reasons:

1) It's on Netflix instant stream currently, which means, if the review piques your interest, you can watch it with little difficulty.

2) It's about a single man in his 30's whose friends are all married. For some reason, it strikes a chord in me.

Company is an older musical (1970's), but not one I grew up knowing. It's not really what I would call family-friendly; although, by today's standards, it is pretty tame. It's really more of a series of vignettes than it is an overarching narrative. The lead, Bobby, is a single man approaching his birthday, and he gets these glimpses into the lives of his married friends, which cause him to reflect on his own relationships.

In many ways, this is the anti-Rent. All of these people are well-to-do, not overburdened with worries about having a place to live or dying of a fatal disease. Their problems are along the lines of relationship satisfaction, and whether it's better to be married or single. In other words, the same things people who go to the theater worry about, and the same things many of my clients bring up in therapy.

The songs themselves are thought-provoking in the way that Sondheim's stuff usually is. Bobby is a familiar archetype-he says he wants to be in a committed relationship, but he's afraid of commitment at the same time. I don't know any people like that. I'm certainly not one of those people. The songs perfectly describe the weirdness of being single with lines like, "Marry me a little, love me just enough."

The video available on Netflix features the 2006 production, which is really unique because all of the principle cast plays instruments. Think about that for a second. I am not talking about people playing the tambourine (though there is one cast member who plays the triangle); I'm talking about a French horn, the oboe, violins, a cello, everything. The cast is actually singing while they play (okay, not the woodwinds or the brass, but the strings and Triangle Lady). And, if I'm not mistaken, some of them are actually playing several different instruments, like the cast is a bunch of junior high band teachers.

Apparently, the director, John Doyle, of the production is a big fan of actors playing the instruments. I think it really works for Company, but he also directed Sweeney Todd that way, and I have trouble seeing Patti Lupone playing the tuba as Mrs. Lovett. And while a lot of people think it loses something with the minimalist orchestration, I kind of like the way the instruments become part of the cast. For example, the instruments really pay off during one song that features a call-and-answer of the husbands and their wives, while Bobby plays a sad, pathetic kazoo, and no one answers back, reminding him, yet again, what he doesn't have because he's single.

Ouch, Company. Ouch.

Broadway Rant: What the...?

I turned on the TV this evening, and, to my surprise, there was another musical on PBS that I had never seen before. It was called Love Never Dies, a sequel to Andrew Lloyd Webber's wildly successful The Phantom of the Opera. I feel like I have to share the weirdness I experienced with the world. This blog post contains spoilers, so if you do not want to have the suspense ruined for you, skip this post. Or just don't ever see this show.

I don't know how many musicals have spun off sequels, but I'm willing to bet not many. Particularly, if the original musical was based on a book by an author who has been dead since 1927. I have to pause to point out that I am a huge fan of The Phantom of the Opera. It ranks right up there with Newsies on the list of the most important musicals of my childhood. However, even as a child, I'm pretty sure I never thought, man, they need to write some more stories about the Phantom. And yet, Andrew Lloyd Webber did. 

The musical has, as yet, not made it to Broadway. It premiered in London in 2010, and ran for less than two years. Critics and audiences alike had very mixed feelings about it (some Phantom fans have a protest website called Love Should Die). Apparently, the show is very popular in Australia, which is where this show was filmed.

The story itself is set 10 years after the events of the original story. The original story took place in Paris, where the Phantom terrorized the Paris Opera House until he was stalked by an angry mob. His true love, Christine, whom he stalked, obsessed over, and built several creepy doll replicas of, married another man, and ran away. Ten years later, Christine and her husband, Raoul, have a child (who is really the Phantom's child because, sure), and the Phantom has emigrated to New York, where he runs a freak show on Coney Island. At the end of the show, Christine dies, and her son runs away with the Phantom.

So, here, in bullet point form, are the problems I had with the story, once I had accepted its existence:

• A megalomaniac like the Phantom is forced out of the Paris Opera House and is going to be content with an act on Coney Island? Okay, show.

• Meg Giry, in this show, is written to make the Phantom appear like a sane person. And there is not one but two women in love with the Phantom? What?

• Did anyone who saw the original musical conveniently forget that the Phantom murdered a bunch of people, or did everyone just think, sure, that guy should raise a child? They both like music, right?

• A few months ago, when I was prepping for my Family Violence class, I stumbled on a website that painstakingly dissected Bella and Edward's relationship in the Twilight books and pointed out all of the similarities between that relationship and a violent relationship. Even though I thought it was stupid, the author raised some good points (secrecy, stalking, isolation, etc.). That said, how are people not up in arms about the relationship between Christine and the Phantom? There was kidnapping, stalking, verbal abuse, murdering people, obsession, isolation...

• The show is trying to convince us that a relationship between Christine and the Phantom could work. But project into the future; if this were a real life relationship, it would probably end in murder-suicide. Just saying. Is this something we as theater-going public want to fantasize about?

• I have heard people compare Phantom to Andrew Lloyd Webber's relationship to ex-wife Sarah Brightman, who played Christine in the original London and Broadway productions. Lloyd Webber was a composer, Brightman was a singer. The true intent of this second musical seems to be to convince those of us who were happy that Christine married Raoul at the end of the first musical that, despite the fact that the Phantom was a horrible person, and Raoul was dashing, handsome, and rich, her heart was always with the Phantom. 

• And, some other stuff we didn't know: Raoul is an alcoholic and a gambler, which is the same as being a madman. So there. He deserves to play second fiddle.

• I'm slightly irritated by the two women from the local PBS station trying to convince me that this is good, and that I want to call my friends and tell them to turn on their TVs. I did text Lisa to tell her I was watching this, but I'm pretty sure what my text said was not what PBS had in mind.

The music itself was...okay. It reminds me of Dave Barry's critique of Paul McCartney's post-Beatle songs, pointing out the sharp dropoff in quality, which was more pronounced because of everything awesome that came before it. The music wasn't bad, but it wasn't moving in any way. It was particularly jarring because there were several callbacks to songs from the original.

As for the sets and costumes, they were incredible, possibly even better than the original. So that was something I liked. Of course, everything was vaguely creepy like I imagine sideshows always are, so the costumes and sets kind of enhanced that.

Needless to say, (but I'm going to say it anyway) I will not be knocking myself out to see this one if it ever makes it to Broadway (don't do it, Andrew). Even if it has Audra McDonald as Christine, Kristin Chenoweth as Meg, Adam Pascal as the Phantom, and Patrick Wilson reprising his role as Raoul.

Who am I kidding? Of course, I would go see that. I'm not made of stone.

Broadway Rant: Chess

Remember when they made a movie about the game Battleship, but it turned out it was really about aliens? That was weird, right?

So you'd think that a musical about chess would be equally weird. But there were no aliens. Only communists.

Chess is another one of those shows that I know about because a taping of it aired on PBS, much like Les Miz, Love Never Dies (stay tuned for a rant on that one), Sunday in the Park with George, and Company (a subject for another post). It was actually done more like a concert, so the staging was mostly done with a projector.

The lyrics written by Tim Rice, who was the lyricist for composers like Alan Menken (Aladdin), Elton John (Aida, Lion King), and Andrew Lloyd Webber (Evita). The score was written by Benny Andersson and Björn Ulvaeus, of ABBA. Doesn't that sound like the beginning of a fabulous musical?

Chess is set during the Cold War, so it features your basic American vs. Russian plot that was such a big thing in that era. The American, played by Adam Pascal, is the cocky and imbalanced reigning world champion of chess (based loosely on Bobby Fischer). The Russian, played by Josh Groban (yes, that Josh Groban) is the humble challenger. It was billed as a love triangle, as the American's girlfriend, played by Idina Menzel (Elphaba! Rachel's mom on Glee!) ends up with the Russian before the end of the first act. It could also be considered a love trapezoid, as the Soviet is actually married to another woman.

But, at its heart, it is about the Cold War. I think. The truth is, the plot is a little convoluted, and I had to keep referring to the show's Wikipedia page to understand what was going on. Apparently, that is one of the reasons Chess was never more popular. The nice thing about this concert was that there was a giant screen behind the stage, and when there was a change of time or place, it showed up on that screen. Even at that, it was a little hard to follow.

But, let's be honest, it was really about hearing Idina, Adam, and Josh. Menzel and Pascal both have sort of rock-and-roll kinds of voices. You wouldn't think those would go well with the almost operatic, certainly easy-listening stylings of Josh Groban, but they were fun to hear. The different voices fit the music very well. There were times when it felt like a Gilbert and Sullivan operetta, and other times where it felt like Mamma Mia. The songs Josh Groban sings tend to have heavy Eastern European influences, while Adam Pascal's songs were mostly introduced with an electric guitar. I am a huge fan of Showtune Saturday Nights, a program on a local station where they play Broadway songs for five hours. I have often heard Josh Groban's voice singing what sounded like another country's national anthem, and never knew what it was from. Turns out it was a song called "Anthem" from this recording of Chess.

Also from Chess is the song, "One Night in Bangkok," which I always thought was a weird song. It really has nothing to do with the plot, but it was a pretty awesome number, with Thai dancers and Adam Pascal in a white suit. However, the showstoppers are songs like Groban's "Anthem," Menzel's "Nobody's Side," and "Heaven Help My Heart," and "Someone Else's Story," by Kerry Ellis, who I had never heard of before, but who also played Elphaba in Wicked.

One of the interesting things about the book is that it emphasizes how life, despite human emotion and complications, is really more like chess, that people make moves, and other people respond, and in the end, you try to act like it was all intentional. As the play goes along, it becomes clearer that the players are also pawns. I found it incredibly interesting how they portrayed good and evil. The American is unlikeable until he starts to talk about his childhood. The Russian is a "nice guy" until you realize he's been cheating on his wife for years. I don't know that I would push people over to see a production of Chess, but I am a huge fan of this concert version, and I've been listening to the songs in my car for weeks.

If you happen to see it on TV, don't skip over it.

Broadway Rant: When Broadway does TV and movies.

I love Broadway so much. So much. And because I love it so much, I am willing to go to a lot of mediocre regional theater in order to see plays I have never seen before, like Aida, The Secret Garden, and The Drowsy Chaperone, to name a few. I have accepted the fact that I do not live in a city with culture, and I make the best of it. You'd think I'd be thrilled about a TV show about a Broadway show with actual Broadway stars in it. I am not.

The show is called Smash, and I watched the pilot with great expectations. It is the story of a group of people developing a musical, from the first idea ("Let's make a musical about Marilyn Monroe!") to the production. I thoroughly enjoyed the pilot. That enjoyment pretty much stopped after about the second or third episode, not because the plotting got ridiculous, or the characters were written as idiots. No, here's why I gave up on Smash:

Hollywood and Broadway are weird together. Weird things happen when musicals are made into movies. Namely, they often cast Hollywood actors to play roles that originated on Broadway, and, often, those Hollywood people can't sing. Okay, let me rephrase that: those Hollywood people can't sing like Broadway people. For the most part, they do fine. I liked Meryl Streep in Mamma Mia (I liked Pierce Brosnan a lot less, though). And there are people who argue persuasively that, when you are singing in a movie, you want to be more subtle, so you don't go for the big Broadway belt. Fine. I can accept that for, say, Anne Hathaway as Fantine in the upcoming Les Miz movie. I will accept that it is technically correct for a dying Fantine to have a weak voice at that moment. I don't expect Patti LuPone (okay, I do, but I get that moviegoers do not).

In the 50's and 60's, they bypassed what we will call the Pierce Brosnan Problem by hiring actors who couldn't sing and dubbing other people's voices for the musical numbers. Marni Nixon, for example, was the uncredited singing voice for Natalie Wood in West Side Story, Deborah Kerr in King and I, and Audrey Hepburn in My Fair Lady (in a role that Julie Andrews originated-tell me she's not screen friendly). I don't know if people back then were easily fooled, or just didn't care. These days, though, directors expect actors to sing their own parts, even if someone else would do a better job, which often leads to mediocre singing in movie musicals.

The recent exception to this is Rent, which was made into a movie a few years ago with almost the entire original cast Broadway, including Taye Diggs, who could have easily been mistaken for man-candy stunt casting. In fact, the entire original Broadway cast of Rent was exceptionally good-looking. Typically, though, by the time a musical is made into a movie, the original cast is too old to play the same roles they played years earlier (case in point, Phantom of the Opera, which was made into a movie 18 years after its original debut in London). Or someone in charge of the movie decides it would be better with a more well-known movie entity, like Justin Timberlake or Catherine Zeta-Jones.

Speaking of Phantom, before the long-anticipated movie was made, rumors flew that celebrity casting would take over the production. Names like John Travolta (I know, right?) and Antonio Banderas (gasp!) were thrown around. In the end, the director decided to cast young, relatively unknown actors. While they did well casting Patrick Wilson, an already two-time Tony Award nominee, but relatively unknown in movies at that point, as Raoul, they cast Gerard Butler as the Phantom, which most people thought was bad move, as the Phantom was supposed to be a musical genius, and Butler had something like four singing lessons prior to his audition. I, too, questioned the casting choice at first, but, upon revisiting the movie, I have decided I kind of like the Phantom with a rougher voice, particularly when juxtaposed against a voice like Wilson's, which is an incredible, traditional Broadway lyric tenor.

As a Broadway fan who does not get to see many Broadway plays, I would really appreciate Hollywood's efforts to cast leads who can actually sing, rather than casting people who react to the leads as if they can sing. Get it together, Smash.

Seize the Day, the first Broadway Rant

A few weeks ago, Stephanie suggested we go to New York City for Memorial Day. It took me about three seconds to decide that sounded like a fabulous idea, especially when she mentioned Broadway musicals, shopping, and awesome food.

I mostly want to talk about the shows we saw, so I will just briefly mention that, while we were there, we ate at the Shake Shack, the Cafeteria, a hot dog cart, a deli by our hotel, the place pictured left and right in Little Italy, and we stopped for dessert at Momofuku Milk Bar and Magnolia Bakery. With the exception of Magnolia's red velvet cupcake, everything else was delicious.

We went into Dash, which is a store that exclusively sells Kardashian merchandise. I tried to take a picture, but a security guard stopped me.

Also, I now own a shirt that says "Clear eyes, full hearts can't lose," on the front, and "Dillon Panthers" on the back, from the NBC store. I struggled with whether or not to get one that said "East Dillon Lions," also, and I was a little disappointed that there was no Riggins 33. End of TV geek rant.

Beginning of Broadway Geek Rant: Somehow, we decided that we needed to see a musical every night. We bought tickets in advance for Saturday and Sunday, but took a chance on half priced tickets on Friday as soon as we got to Times Square. The show we ended up picking was Memphis.

At this point in my in rant, I would like to disclose that my style of Broadway musical selection normally goes something like this:

1. Pick a show with a famous Broadway performer headlining who is also originating the production, so I can buy the soundtrack and pretend I'm back at the theater (See this post).

2. Pick a show with the original cast (see above).

3. Pick a show with a famous Broadway performer.

4. Pick a show I think I would like.

5. Pick a show I know I like.

It sounds backward, and slightly pretentious. Also, I am not a fan of jukebox musicals, and I try not to see anything I have seen before, even it wasn't on Broadway, and even if I loved it.

Our criteria for selecting Memphis went like this:

1. Pick three shows that are available (this eliminated The Lion King and that other musical that makes fun of our religion).

2. Narrow it down to 2 we would both be willing to see (that eliminated Anything Goes and Rock of Ages).

3. Pick the one with the cheapest tickets (that eliminated Spider-man).

Memphis fit all criteria on the second list, and criterion 3 on the first list, which I didn't realize until we were standing in line at the theater. It is the story of a mostly fictitious DJ in Memphis during the 1950's who first began playing "black" rock and roll on white radio stations. Adam Pascal (right) played the DJ, Huey Calhoun.

Adam Pascal is best known on Broadway for having played Roger in the original production of Rent (he's also in the movie with some seriously bad hair), as well as the original Radames in Aida. Fun fact: he can also be seen in the movie School of Rock, with Jack Black, as the leader of the band Jack Black's character was kicked out of at the beginning of the movie (bad hair again).

Adam Pascal was not part of the OBC (original Broadway cast), but I have watched a few minutes of the original cast on Netflix, and I have to say, I liked his performance better. Pascal plays the DJ as quirky, while the original actor is more like Forrest Gump. Also, while I have previously professed that Pascal sings like he is constipated, I have since retracted that statement. Because of Memphis, I am officially a fan. I am also now a fan of Montego Glover, who played Huey's love interest, Felicia. She is less well-known, but no less talented.

Memphis, itself, was great. It was fun, the songs were catchy, and the dancing was great. Rest assured, as soon as I have money again, I will be buying this soundtrack.

The second night, we went to see Newsies.

Newsies was the first musical I ever loved. I bought the soundtrack at MediaPlay (remember MediaPlay?) when I was probably about 12 or 13. Newsies was a movie musical made by Disney in 1992, which featured Christian Bale as the head newsboy in the late 1800's, when the newsboys went on strike against the newspaper owners, including Joseph Pulitzer, who was played in the movie by Robert Duvall. It is a vaguely true story. Twenty years later, Christian Bale is better known for being Batman, and the musical is now on Broadway. It met criteria 2 and 5 on my Broadway ranking system, but Stephanie picked it, and I couldn't have been happier.

First of all, I got to sit on an actual chair, which made me tall enough to see everything, which doesn't always happen. We also had awesome seats (we were in the center of the last row in the orchestra section). The musical was modified for Broadway, which could have ruined childhood memories for me, but I was very pleased with all the adaptations to the music and story, to the point that I didn't even miss the original actors. Jeremy Jordan (not the early 90's pop singer) played Jack Kelly, and was not only a great singer and dancer, but also hit the Broadway leading man requirement of having a cleft chin.

The dancing in general was fantastic, incorporating ballet, tap, and gymnastic moves that seemed to defy laws of physics. It sort of put the original choreography in the movie to shame. I would highly recommend it to anyone wanting to take kids to see something on Broadway.

The third show was the one I picked, Porgy and Bess, which, according to the Broadway ranking system, was a 1, as it was the original cast revival and featured Audra McDonald as Bess.

Audra McDonald completes the trifecta (with Kristin Chenoweth, Lea Salonga) of my favorite Broadway actresses, all of whom I have now seen live (Sutton Foster runs a close fourth. I would have pushed to see Anything Goes if she were still in it, instead of starring in a TV show written by Amy Sherman-Palladino, which I will also watch).

Audra McDonald was in the original production of Ragtime, as well as a recent production of 110 in the Shade, among many, many other Broadway productions. She performed with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir a few years ago, but she is probably best known for her role on Private Practice, which, when it originally aired, was on right after Pushing Daisies, which featured Kristin Chenoweth. Also on Private Practice was Taye Diggs, who played her ex-husband, who is also a Broadway performer, in addition to being married to Idina Menzel, who I would also love to see in a Broadway show. Whew.

Audra McDonald was perfect as Bess, which was a different role than anything I had ever seen her in before, but one for which she just won a Tony. Porgy was played by Norm Lewis, who I recognized as Javert in the most recent Les Miserables in Concert special that PBS is airing RIGHT NOW AS I AM TYPING THIS. He has an incredible voice, and his performance as a man with limited use of one of his legs was insane. Also, the supporting cast had these really chilling harmonies that were amazing to listen to.

Porgy and Bess, though, is much more like an opera than anything else we saw. Like I said, the performances were incredible, but the music itself was pretty highbrow, and the story of a poor fishing community was pretty sad. It had the least singable soundtrack. I would recommend it if you want something more artsy, or if you really love Audra McDonald.

It was a great weekend. It has sort of ruined me for my regular life, but isn't that what vacations are for?

Also, after I started writing this, I realized I had a lot more to say about Broadway musicals in general, so consider this the first in a series of posts about musicals. I apologize if that is not your thing.

I just never get tired of DC

I do a fair amount of traveling around the country--mostly for work, but occasionally for pleasure. There are three places that, for no apparent reason, I tend to end up statistically more often than others: Atlanta, Ft. Worth, and Washington, DC.

I love going to Atlanta because it is the only time I get to see Tracy.

Ft. Worth isn't my favorite city in Texas, but it's certainly not a bad place.

But DC. . . Sigh.

I was there less than 48 hours, most of which were spent in a hotel conference room discussing collecting data in our student clinics. (For those of you who may be wondering, I will be working at BYU for another year, and we will see what happens after that).

But I did venture out long enough to have dinner with this man:

I fully intended to get a picture of Ryan with my new camera, but it was raining pretty hard that night, and I didn't want to get it wet. Please enjoy this picture of him with Evonne at a Chief's barn party, circa 2008.

Ryan left Lubbock around the same time that I did, and while I settled into academia in the lovely, urbane city of Pleasant Grove, Utah, Ryan headed out to DC to become a big-time patent attorney. He was kind enough to take time out of his busy life to have dinner with me at this place:

a decision born of hunger, rain, a 90-minute wait, and a bunch of hockey fans desperate for Texas barbecue (I still don't get that one). But the food was great. Not only does Bobby do a great burger, but he also did about the best chocolate shake I have ever had (side note: why don't all shakes come with a really big straw? It's nice to drink a shake without getting a migraine).

Plus, I got to hang out with Ryan, which was awesome. I have known Ryan over 10 years, and he's one of my favorite people to have a stimulating conversation about just about anything from politics to work to hockey. 

On our way back to my hotel, we passed the Washington Monument, and I asked Ryan if he ever stopped being in awe of DC. He said that if that ever happened, he'd have to think seriously about moving.

So I was ecstatic when we finished our second day of meetings early and I had the opportunity to do some sightseeing.

We visited the Air and Space Museum...

...walked through the Supreme Court...

...and stopped to look at the Capitol Building.

Of course, the whole trip finished on sort of a sour note. My flight out of Denver was delayed. Then we got stuck on the runway while a microburst passed by us. When we finally did take off, there was still a fair amount of wind, which rocked us back and forth. It was the first time I have ever used the airsickness bag located in the seat back pocket in front of me. Sadly, it was not the last.

When I got off the plane, the flight attendant chirped cheerily at me, "Have a good evening." I didn't have the energy to tell her that ship had sailed, and she should have said something like, "Better luck next time," instead.

I still love DC.

And we're back

It's been awhile since I posted anything that had a picture I took. There are a couple of reasons for this:

• I am not a person who remembers to take pictures at opportune times, such as friends' weddings, on trips, or at significant moments in my own life. It just doesn't happen.
• I have never owned a good camera, so pictures usually end up being taken using either my point-and-shoot digital camera that I bought when I finished my masters' degree (I think. It's weird that I can't actually remember when I bought this camera) or on my phone, which is basically like a point-and-shoot itself.
• Someone (my sister) has made fun of the pictures I have taken and posted on my blog-particularly when they have been pictures of food. If you're curious, it's mostly been because of the last one.

So I stopped taking pictures-particularly of food, for a long time.

But, recently, I've decided that, instead of refusing to take pictures because the pictures I take are bad, I need to get better at taking pictures.

So I started by investing some money in a good camera.

I also bought the For Dummies book for my camera, which has also been a good investment.

And while I am in the beginning stages of learning how to use my camera, allow me to give a demonstration of the progress I have made.

Here's a picture I posted on my blog during the cupcake project. This particular cupcake is an applesauce spice cupcake with brown sugar cream cheese frosting. Melanee said some particularly hurtful things about this picture:

Now, here is the same cupcake with a different camera:

Better, right?

I hope to get better as I go along. My camera was in Full-Auto mode for this picture, something I would probably change. Additionally, the resolution isn't great. I haven't figured out how to import pictures in RAW format onto my computer. Also, I now own a 50 mm lens, which is what Bakerella uses to shoot pictures of her cupcakes. Also, at some point, I will probably invest in PhotoShop and start touching pictures up with that. I will probably keep revisiting these particular cupcakes, since that is the kind of weird obsessive thing I do when I do a project.

Stay tuned.

Rileys vs. Jakes

Author's Note: So, I wrote this back in November and just left it in my draft folder because a) it was just the ranting of a crazy person, b) I compared myself to a football player I could, in theory, run into on campus (I never have, though I did see Jimmer at Chik-fil-A in the mall one time) which also seemed weird, and c) I didn't want people I worked with to read this. But since then, a couple of things have happened:

• I did not get hired by BYU for a job for which I've been groomed for the last two years. The day after I was told, I had to attend our student interviews, which was slightly gruesome. To introduce ourselves, we were asked to say what kind of collegiate athlete we would be (what was particularly weird about that was that we had an actual collegiate athlete as an interviewee, but that's another story). And this post came back to me.
• Jake Heaps left BYU after being groomed for two years to be the next big BYU quarterback. So now the metaphor just has me all confused. Am I Jake now?
• I realized that no one is reading this blog.  

In a second perfect storm of college football and my regular life, I find myself overidentifying with the BYU quarterback controversy, which, oddly, has now been going on for two years--coinciding perfectly with my time here at BYU. Time that, in the next couple of months, will either be extended indefinitely, or ended shortly. I could go on to have a great career at BYU, or be a placeholder while the person they really want is getting ready to take over the job. In short, these days, I feel like Riley Nelson, which is odd, since I have no idea how Riley Nelson feels.

It is a strange battle between a transfer student from Utah State and a high school phenom. One will most likely end his football playing career at BYU, while the other will probably be like a top-level BYU quarterback and go on to play a few forgettable seasons in the NFL before returning to a job on the BYU coaching staff. One has the arm. The other has the heart, and the respect and admiration of his coaches and teammates. One looks like what we expect from a BYU quarterback-if erratic at times, while the other runs, takes hits, and makes plays, and struggles with the long-bomb passes downfield that BYU is known for. And don't get me started on the fluffy blond hair or the abs with their own Twitter account. Neither of those things fit in this labored metaphor.

So why do I identify with Riley Nelson? It has to do with my precarious position as a second-year visiting professor in BYU's School of Family Life. I graduated with my master's degree at 26, after completing a mission, which has had an important impact on my life. I finished my Ph.D. in a timely fashion-not something everyone does, but nothing out of the ordinary. I understand most of the stats I learned in grad school, but no one thinks I am a whiz. I got a job at BYU partly because I am good, and partly because I am better than the other people who are available. And yet, I can't shake the feeling that, if I don't look out; if I'm not playing my heart out; if I get injured and don't show up to practice with broken ribs; that there is a phenom, four years younger than me, looking to take my place.

It feels, sometimes, like I can be doing everything right and still lose out to someone else's potential.

Here's the thing about Riley Nelson: while he works hard at football, he knows it is not his final destination. Should he find himself not starting his senior year, it will not impact his career plans in any major way. He will land on his feet. And the truth is, if I am, indeed, a Riley Nelson, so will I, no matter what happens to my present job.

Breathe. Get back to work.

Stuck in Texas...Again

So, a few weeks ago, I flew out to Texas for Kim's wedding. It was a beautiful, event-filled wedding. You'd think I would have some pictures of it. I do not. Bad blogger. Here is a link to her blog, though, where the day is documented with beautiful pictures.

It was the first time I had been back to Lubbock since leaving the day after I graduated. Martha and I stayed together at the Hampton Inn less than a mile from my apartment. Martha is one of my favorite people in the world, no less because she is a complete and total germaphobe. She slept in a sacklike sheet that kept her from having to touch the hotel linens, wore shoes anytime her feet touched the floor, and brought her own towels. She says she has learned things about how hotels are cleaned, which I begged her NOT to share with me. I have no pictures of Martha.

I got food at Fuzzy's, Spanky's, Rudy's, Sheridan's, and Cake. I have no pictures of the food, mostly because I am bad at food blogging.

I stopped at the Pancake House the day after the wedding, where Kim and Landon's families were enjoying a wedding breakfast. I immediately decided I liked Landon because he playfully convinced Kim not to wear a giant chunky watch with her gorgeous wedding dress. I did not get to enjoy the food because I was running late for my flight as it was.

Or so I thought.

Because I haven't lived in Lubbock for 18 months, I forgot one of the lessons I learned the first time I visited Lubbock: nothing flies out in a dust storm. I got stuck there. And I was reminded that there are worse places to be stuck in than Lubbock, Texas, particularly at this stage in my life.

In the short span of two-and-a-half days, I saw (without much effort) almost every single person I know who still lives in Lubbock, including my former boss Jason, my former branch president, Chief and his wife, several people I knew from church, the Merrills, most of the people I worked with in the temple, and several people I knew from school.

Admittedly, many of the people who were dear to me when I lived in Texas no longer live there, but I found ways to remedy that.

I ended Sunday night the way I often did when I lived there--with a long conversation with Stephanie.

I spent a good portion of that Monday in various airports hanging out with Maddie Kimball, who I didn't know before, but instantly felt the bond of Lubbock and Kim and Texas Tech.

It reminded me of everything I miss about Lubbock, and why I love Friday Night Lights, and why I get nostalgic for Texas. After the craziness of my life the last few weeks, those days in Lubbock mean even more. Being there with those people was like coming home.

And home isn't a place where you think to take pictures.

A New Year

I realize that, in a couple of days, it will be February, and the New Year thing will be remarkably late, but I feel justified in whining that this month has been crazy, and I do not feel guilty for not blogging during January. I do not have the same excuse for the other months in which I have not blogged.

Some day I will add posts for some of the recent happenings in my life: a trip to Lubbock, a concert, a trip to Park City during the Sundance Film Festival. However, all of these things occurred the short span of a week, along with a pretty important job interview. So those will have to wait.

For now, I want to talk about my New Year's resolutions because I feel like it is a good way to hold myself accountable to accomplish them. I only had one resolution for myself for 2012, which goes something like this:

Quit messing around. (I know, it sounds like something my dad used to say to my brother Shane when he was a kid, accompanied by a good-natured shove to the back of Shane's head).

It seems like, since my mission, I have been looking forward to accomplishing some big goal in my life: graduating, getting into a masters' program, finishing classes, getting hours, taking the licensure exam, defending theses/dissertations, getting a job, keeping a job. You get the idea. Sometimes, I use these things as an excuse not to do other things in my life--the little things.

Consequently, I do not exercise regularly, my temple attendance has gotten spotty, and there are perpetually dishes in my sink. And I let these things slide because of the bigger goals, and think, "I'll have plenty of time for that stuff after (fill in the blank)."

Well, I am running out of these big goals/excuses, and it's time to fix some of these little things in my life.

Happy 2012!